Like millions of other Americans, I cannot get Donald Trump out of my brain. Not this weekend, at any rate. I sit down with family. We chat. We watch a show. As soon as it is paused, my look glazes over. My consciousness is instantly invaded once more by the man in the White House. I am wracked over again with loathing. Every second I do not keep up the stream of intentional distraction—the instant I turn off the spigot—the orange goblin comes stomping back in. What's going to happen on Tuesday? I think. What tricks is he going to pull? I am like Brecht in his incongruous California exile, wishing he could write of trees, but finding instead that his mind is full at every turn of "horror at the housepainter's speeches." (Kuhn/Constantine trans.)
All of this is made much worse, of course, by the fact that I know I ought to be thinking about nothing else. A society with two hundred plus years of democratic elections and peaceful transfers of power experiencing one of its most perilous, hair-raising moments—what exactly should a citizen be thinking about every second of the day, a few days before an election, apart from this? Thus, this particular obsession and rumination is harder to dismiss than the average debilitating panic. One cannot so easily write it off as unhealthy. It might very well be unhealthy: indeed, I'm sure it is. But it seems nonetheless obligatory.